- 2006 — The Crunkateers
- 2007 — Team Satan
- 2008 — Nigel and Kygel
- 2009 — The Spains
- 2010 — Boner
- 2011 — The Brooklyn Dorps
- 2012 — Daerp
- 2013 — Y'all are Dicks
- 2014 — Snowpiercer
- 2015 — The Steves
- 2016 — Arrivederci Ragazzo
- 2017 — DEF NOT LAST
- 2018 — Geriatric Gambino
- 2019 — pornhub.com/joeymart
- 2020 — I WON THE LEAGUE!!!!
- 2021 — Eat Foot
- 2022 — No Worries If Not!
- 2023 — No Worries If Not!
- 2024 — The Pope Maybe in Rome
- 2025 — NYC Bojangles 2k25
- 2026 — terriblehorriblenogoodverybad
2006 — present
Jared
Jared has played in each of the league's 21 seasons, managing a team since the CPFFL's inaugural 2006 season.
| Year | Team Name | Finish | Record | Points |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 2006 | The Crunkateers | 8 | 5-8-1 | 840 |
| 2007 | Team Satan | 2 | 9-5-0 | 1295 |
| 2008 | Nigel and Kygel | 10 | 4-10-0 | 1053 |
| 2009 | The Spains | 7 | 7-7-0 | 1229 |
| 2010 | Boner | 12 | 3-11-0 | 1071 |
| 2011 | The Brooklyn Dorps | 7 | 8-6-0 | 1258 |
| 2012 | Daerp | 2 | 10-4-0 | 1402 |
| 2013 | Y'all are Dicks | 3 | 8-5-1 | 1334 |
| 2014 | Snowpiercer | 7 | 5-9-0 | 1358 |
| 2015 | The Steves | 1 | 8-6-0 | 1253 |
| 2016 | Arrivederci Ragazzo | 9 | 6-8-0 | 1053 |
| 2017 | DEF NOT LAST | 10 | 6-8-0 | 1174.24 |
| 2018 | Geriatric Gambino | 11 | 5-9-0 | 1163.64 |
| 2019 | pornhub.com/joeymart | 10 | 5-9-0 | 1303.18 |
| 2020 | I WON THE LEAGUE!!!! | 9 | 6-8-0 | 1251.52 |
| 2021 | Eat Foot | 2 | 9-5-0 | 1393.70 |
| 2022 | No Worries If Not! | 11 | 6-8-0 | 1247.10 |
| 2023 | No Worries If Not! | 6 | 7-7-0 | 1306.96 |
| 2024 | The Pope Maybe in Rome | 4 | 10-4-0 | 1407.28 |
| 2025 | NYC Bojangles 2k25 | 9 | 6-8-0 | 1393.96 |
| 2026 | terriblehorriblenogoodverybad | 9 | 2-4-0 | 579.50 |
| Total | 135-149-2 | 25367.08 | ||
| Avg | 7 | 6-7-0 | 1208 |
| Opponent | Record | Jared's pts (avg) | Opponent's pts (avg) |
|---|---|---|---|
| Curran | 9-9-0 | 1666.4 (93) | 1642 (91) |
| Edwin | 13-15-0 | 2450.08 (88) | 2323.28 (83) |
| Isaac | 15-16-0 | 2858.22 (89) | 2999.22 (94) |
| Jack | 14-13-1 | 2510.26 (87) | 2417.08 (83) |
| Joe | 7-6-0 | 1127.8 (87) | 1066.56 (82) |
| Joey | 15-14-0 | 2596.06 (87) | 2767.38 (92) |
| Lowell | 13-15-0 | 2407.02 (86) | 2636.14 (94) |
| Madison | 17-15-0 | 2932.82 (89) | 2842.6 (86) |
| Matt | 5-7-0 | 1052 (88) | 1051 (88) |
| Nico | 1-2-0 | 182 (61) | 209 (70) |
| Noah | 15-15-0 | 2737.7 (88) | 2780.24 (90) |
| Patrick | 6-7-0 | 1315.74 (94) | 1371.58 (98) |
| Philip | 5-6-0 | 886 (81) | 947 (86) |
| Sarah | 3-7-0 | 867.82 (79) | 1081.58 (98) |
| Tyler | 0-0-1 | 58 (58) | 58 (58) |
| Willie | 10-17-0 | 2226.22 (80) | 2382.54 (85) |